Joanna West's Final Five Reviews on the Day of the Apocalypse

1. Coya's Books and Games - 4 Stars

I've been a customer of Coya's for over 40 years, and it's always attracted a bit of an odd element. Heck, my husband and I turned a few heads, back in the day. I'm happy to listen to the woman who preaches about the healing power of essential oils in the self-help section, and I'm no stranger to the snickering, superior teens who perch in the café like a flock of ravens.

But there has to be a limit, doesn't there? Today, when I went in for my usual coffee, biscotti, and paper, the teen crowd was replaced by a collection of glowing wraith-like figures, whose high-pitched keening was certainly a step down from teenage laughter. The costumes were impressive (I swear it was as if I could see right through them) but the so-called ‘music’ made me feel light-headed and oddly lonely. I appreciate that Coya's supports the arts. But I say, bring back the bearded gentleman with the acoustic guitar.

That said, they've got the best drip coffee in town, and the biscotti is great too.

My first four-star visit. Hopefully, they'll have this resolved next time.

2. 4th Street Flowers - 2 Stars

I usually get my flowers from Fantastic Floral, but they were closed, so I decided to give 4th Street Flowers a try. Boy, did I learn my lesson.

The sign said Open, but no one greeted me as I entered. I wandered about a bit, while I waited for the staff to come out from the back. The flowers they have are beautiful, with some varieties I’ve never seen before. Did you know they make glowing silver roses? And these little bell-shaped blossoms in all sorts of colors, that actually ring out when you touch them. The sound gave me the chills though, high and sharp and oddly familiar.

Eventually, I got tired of waiting and tried calling out. And did anyone answer? No. Really, if it’s flowers you want, Fantastic Floral is the better bet. No glowing roses, but they know how to treat their customers.

I wish I could say I stormed out, but I couldn't leave without flowers. I've been visiting my husband’s grave every week for nearly two decades, and I always bring a bouquet. I wasn't about to let poor service change that. Not after the day I’d had. (Whatever happened to happy families shopping after church on Sunday? I saw barely a soul downtown.) Finally, I took one of their premade bouquets and left cash and a very stern note on the counter.

Two stars, and that’s only because of the unusual varieties they stock.

3. Unity Fountain - 1 Star

It's gone. I watched it go. Watched the great metal globe start spinning. Watched the stone children stand and stretch. Watched the swan, such an ugly, unfortunate carving, spread its stone wings.

It flew.

It flew, and the children tilted their heads, as if to admire its flight. Then they linked hands and started dancing. I think they were singing. I could see their stone lips moving.

And the globe kept spinning, shining brighter and brighter, still spraying water out in every direction.

My Max proposed to me at the Unity Fountain. Cliché, I know, but it's true. So many weekends, sitting on that same bench, remembering when he used to sit there beside me.

What would he say to all of this? Maybe he’d smile. He always did like a change of pace. It's all changing very quickly, now.

As I was leaving, the globe started floating upward and the children with it. One star.

4. Dawn View Cemetery - 3 Stars

Maybe it's silly to review a cemetery, but in the end, death's just another series of decisions you leave for the people who outlive you. I learned that when my husband died. He was never one to have strong opinions about anything, so it was up to me whether to bury or cremate him, and where to put the body.

I picked Dawn View because it was close, and I liked the name. It’s a pretty place, all gentle green hills and old, gnarled oak trees. If it weren't for the gravestones, you might forget its purpose. But there’s death enough to weigh on you, even on good days.

Today, though, it was full to bursting with ghosts. I've never been the superstitious sort, never figured Max was anywhere but gone. But you look out on a crowd of ghosts like that, everything from elderly sorts to little children, all watching the sky, and you tell me you don’t believe in an afterlife.

I made straight for Max's grave, and there he was, same as the day I'd buried him. 18 years younger than I am now. Still so very handsome. It hurt, you know, seeing him like that. Seeing him at all.

Hurt more that he didn’t seem to see me. Didn’t notice me setting down my flowers, didn’t turn at the sound of my voice. I just sat there and cried, while he stared toward the sun. Looking at what? I don't know.

Three stars. I didn’t bury Max to have him rising again. You’d think a cemetery would be better at keeping its dead.

5. The Endless Abyss - 5 Stars

 I'm surprised to find a listing for this already! I guess that's the benefit of living in the future. Or was the benefit, I suppose.

The sky is dark and empty and very cold. The ghosts rise up, silent, and the wraiths’ keening goes on and on. It seems to come from everywhere. What little light remains comes from this phone and the roses on Max’s grave. I watched him disappear upward, into the dark. I'm sure it's not long before it pulls me up, too.

Maybe it’s beautiful, beyond the dark. Max’s face held so much wonder.

In the spirit of optimism, I give the Endless Abyss five stars.

Orion’s Belt delights in bringing to you “Joanna West’s Final Five Reviews on the Day of the Apocalypse,” written by the incredibly talented Seattle-ite Kelly Sandoval.

Kelly Sandoval lives in Seattle, where the weather is always happy to make staying in and writing seem like a good idea. She shares her home with her patient husband, chaos tornado toddler, and anarchist tortoise. Her interactive novel Runt of the Litter is available from Choice of Games. Find her on twitter at @kellymsandoval or visit her website at kellysandovalfiction.com.